i couldn't resist documenting

its the F1 BABY!! singpost closed at 6 on a weekday so my parents literally sped off to causeway point after work. when we asked for the tickets, they came in a box. A BOX! so after that the excitement was sky high. we went to eat at crystal jade and i tore the box open like some ADD kid ripping his x'mas prezzie a the stroke of midnight. for the memories to come...

the much awaited tickets in a very supicious box. does this count as a suspicious article??

wtm an empty box! they wasted lots of tape on this. hard to open. talk about going green.

supicious looking dvds?

tada! lanyards for each day! i wonder if the walkabout tickets are already this elaborate, how about those grandstand ones?? patiently waiting for 26 sept (:

high low

gosh two posts in one day!i must be going bonkers

ok so my mum came home from work and was telling me about her colleague leaving the school over dinner. brief background information, my mum is a teacher at an international school, thus her colleague is also a teacher. let's call her Mdm B (she's french), since i'm not going to name names here. now Mdm B is rather well liked in the school so naturally people are quite sad that she is leaving. one of the other teachers, Mr H, decided to have a little farewell piano recital for her. the students would play some songs. when it ended, Mdm B was touched and she personally thanked one of the students, S. S is a 7 year-old Japanese girl. her response to her teacher's appreciation was going up to Mdm B and poking her nose, while saying "you have a long nose!" for god know's what reason. if you weren't close to someone and they made such a remark to you, i'm sure you would have been insulted. however, i digress, i was rather taken aback by her lack of politeness around her teacher, and the fact that she was just so direct. perhaps she's kid, thus explaining the nature of her behaviour. but she's also a Japanese, and aren't Japanese suppose to be of a high context culture? while her behaviour seemed to lean on being a characteristic of low context culture.

low context culture has great importance on the spoken word, while high context culture has subtle cues as part of their communication. high context culture sees explicit communication style as rude and insensitive, while low context culture sees indirect communication style as tricky and deceptive.

is this an indicaiton that the new generation is going to revolutionize our world and make the majority of the population be of low context culture? but then again, perhaps kids are just being kids, you can't change who they are. at least not yet.

be an individual

You know that feeling, when you're a newbie in some situations, say a freshman in school. So many new people, so many different cultures. Culture here doesn't exactly mean race-Chinese/ Malay/Indian etc. The culture here refers to a particular group's collective answer to fundamental questions like "who we are" and our "template for living". You try your hardest to change your previous habits and routines to fit into your discovery of this group's culture. Finally you fit perfectly in your new culture and settle as a member of the group. Later you become on such good terms with the group that you may even rise in rank/status within the group and move form a new member to a full member. But what if that culture isn't a good one?

I was reading this article in Seventeen magazine (July issue), just a few minutes earlier, about glue-sniffing. It was a feeling as simple as wanting "to feel like one of the group", that cost this girl Charlene* a rehab stint. Yup, that was how bad her situation was. Well it wasn't elaborated how "hellish" her life was for an entire year, but I think we can all imagine. Glue-sniffing is considered an illegal substance. When the addiction goes out of control, the side effects include - loss of control of the body, cramps and pain, vision nad learning difficulties, tendency to bleed and bruise, memory loss, permanent brain, liver and kidney damage. Regardless of how much pressure you were under to pick up this horrible addiction (as far as I'm am concerned, NO is not that hard to say), would you really risk such stuff just to be accepted into the group? Are humans so weak in nature that we always succumb to the herd-mentality? Is there anything wrong with being an individual - unique in all it's glory? We all have our fair share of cliques at some point of time, and we choose to hang out with certain individuals instead of others. But sooner or later you'll come to realize your own identity, your true self. You don't necessarily have to fit into any group, but you will share a culture with them. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. For example, off the top of my head, a singer - Jason Mraz and a author - Lauren Weisberger are different. They are obviously not of the same gender and will most probably have different behaviours, though not necessarily because of their gender. But ultimately they share a culture of being interested in arts - lyrics and writing, respectively.

So I say, ditch that mentality of I-must-fit-into-a-group-because-its-the-right-thing-to-do. Just be yourself, don't do something that's not what you'd normally do. Be an individual.

groupthink

so i was having a lovely buffet with my family today and there was laksa. i don't eat laksa cos its too hot for me (low tolerance of spicy food). since it was a buffet, obviously you have to at least try one of every dish they're serving to break even, so my aunt and cousin took the laksa at the same time. my aunt ate it and said it was yummy, better than average. my cousin ate it and didn't nod in agreement, instead he said good laksa was wasted on him as he couldn't really tell the difference. but in the end as a joke he said it was nice too. "wonderful" even. then when i got back and started revising group communication, i wondered if this counted as groupthink, illusion of unanimity? Illusion of unanimity is when a member in doubt believes that everyone else agrees with the group's chosen decision/conclusion/action. Well this happened within family so i don't think its the perfect example for this but i guess you could somehow relate it to the actual meaning.

sims RELATIONSHIPS

Those of you who play The Urbz: Sims in the City (this xbox game) you'll know that in order to gain status and progress in your relationship with the other people in the game, all you have to do is some moves/trick/stunt that that particular person loves. It could be the skate trick/ pub song/ air guitar/blow fire (as shown in the photos above) etc. When you do that, there will be some yellow stars (again,shown above) above your character's head and person you're interacting with, indicating that the relationship is progressing. If you insult the person, the stars will be red. Keep having yellow stars and your relationship with that person will level up sooner or later. But that can only happen in reel life! In real life, things aren't as easy as that.

According to the Knapp Model of Relational Development, there are five stages of forming and developing a relationship, and there are five stages of breaking and ending a relationship.

Forming&developing:

stage 1-initiating
stage 2-experimenting
stage 3-intensifying
stage 4-intergrating
stage 5-bonding

Basically you start off first by choosing who you wish to start a relationship with, and you initiate conversation. Have small talk and later increased commitment and physical contact.

Then you tell the world that you are a couple and eventually formalises obligation and commitment by marriage or something like that.

Breaking&ending:

stage 1-differentiaing

stage 2-circumscribing

stage 3-stagnating

stage 4-avoiding

stage 5-terminating

The relationship turns sour when frequent conflicts occur. Then there is a shrinking of relational interest and commitment. And the absence of joy and excitement that was once there. Then you avoid one another all together and eventually end it.

Sustaining a relationship with someone isn't an easy task. You may see each other everyday and yet you may feel that you have less and less things to talk about each time. You may even choose not to meet up anymore, coming up with excuses for being busy. Ignoring their text messages, calls etc. The feeling or joy and excitement disappears too. Before you know it, you may be falling apart. This is when you can see each other daily, let alone a relationship is long-distance. When you don't see the other party, almost all nonverbal communication cease to exist (refer to previous post for more info :). the relationship could become boring and as you meet new people, there is a temptation to leave your partner in the dark and carry on with you life without them. Infidelity may take place. But can you really blame yourself for wanting someone that you can reach physically instead of waiting on someone who isn't there? After all, the human mind responds to the senses. No doubt with today's technologies, long distance relationships are becoming easier to maintain. All you really need is tons of commitment from both parties. You need two hands to clap, the same thing applies here. It may not be easy, but its do-able. If only life was as easy as the SIMS.

photos from: http://xbox.ign.com/objects/677/677606.html

nonverbal communication

So yesterday we were having comm. quiz on nonverbal communication. Did you know that there are 8 types of nonverbal communication?!ok let me try and break it down for you... ps those of you who are my classmates-must thank me, im helping you recap!, those of you who are new to this-hope you'll find this useful :)

#1 kinesics-this includes all the body movement/gestures/language eg-hugging your friend to show that you miss/love etc him/her
#2 paralinguistics-this is all sounds that convey meaning eg-giggling/yawning
#3 chronemics-this is regarding time orientation eg-ppl in phuket(comparatively slow-paced life) will see time differently as compared to ppl in hong kong(fast-paced life)
#4 artifact-objects eg-the lady carrying the gorgeous new Marc Jacobs bag will give the impression she's well off$$$
#5 oculesics-this has to do with your eyes, eye contact eg-winking provocatively at some hot guy "wink-wink"
#6 haptics-touch eg-Spongebob puts his arm aorund Patrick's shoulder to console him
#7 proxemics-any kind of space, territorial, spatial arrangement eg-Blair doesn't want to sit with Jenny, so she puts her bag on the empty seat beside her
#8 physical appearance-appearance lor eg-this lady walking down the street in knee high boots, fishnet stockings, micro-mini skirt, tube top, full make up will give you the impression that she obviously doesn't work in an office

I never knew there were so many types of nonverbal communication. However, learning about these made me think about something. Without talking, you could still be sending out many signals etc, we all have basic understanding of that. BUT what if you didn't intend to??? Does it mean that the next time you find yourself in a conversation, you have to pay additional attention to the nonverbal signs you're sending? Wouldn't that be so tiring? Imagine having to be aware of the 8 things mentioned above, while chatting with friends. Maybe not even chatting with them face-to-face, maybe just on MSN.

After giving it some thought, I think I wouldn't be able to keep up with all that. I would just give up after a while. Besides I don't think it's worth the trouble. People who know you well enough will know the true you and won't bother judging you for just every single thing you do. Who cares what other people think of you. To hell with them. As long you you're happy, everyone's happy, then we can all just go live in our happy house and live happily every after!