You know that feeling, when you're a newbie in some situations, say a freshman in school. So many new people, so many different cultures. Culture here doesn't exactly mean race-Chinese/ Malay/Indian etc. The culture here refers to a particular group's collective answer to fundamental questions like "who we are" and our "template for living". You try your hardest to change your previous habits and routines to fit into your discovery of this group's culture. Finally you fit perfectly in your new culture and settle as a member of the group. Later you become on such good terms with the group that you may even rise in rank/status within the group and move form a new member to a full member. But what if that culture isn't a good one?
I was reading this article in Seventeen magazine (July issue), just a few minutes earlier, about glue-sniffing. It was a feeling as simple as wanting "to feel like one of the group", that cost this girl Charlene* a rehab stint. Yup, that was how bad her situation was. Well it wasn't elaborated how "hellish" her life was for an entire year, but I think we can all imagine. Glue-sniffing is considered an illegal substance. When the addiction goes out of control, the side effects include - loss of control of the body, cramps and pain, vision nad learning difficulties, tendency to bleed and bruise, memory loss, permanent brain, liver and kidney damage. Regardless of how much pressure you were under to pick up this horrible addiction (as far as I'm am concerned, NO is not that hard to say), would you really risk such stuff just to be accepted into the group? Are humans so weak in nature that we always succumb to the herd-mentality? Is there anything wrong with being an individual - unique in all it's glory? We all have our fair share of cliques at some point of time, and we choose to hang out with certain individuals instead of others. But sooner or later you'll come to realize your own identity, your true self. You don't necessarily have to fit into any group, but you will share a culture with them. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. For example, off the top of my head, a singer - Jason Mraz and a author - Lauren Weisberger are different. They are obviously not of the same gender and will most probably have different behaviours, though not necessarily because of their gender. But ultimately they share a culture of being interested in arts - lyrics and writing, respectively.
So I say, ditch that mentality of I-must-fit-into-a-group-because-its-the-right-thing-to-do. Just be yourself, don't do something that's not what you'd normally do. Be an individual.
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i suppose some people just can't do without the company eh? hah. but i guess its kind of true that people nowadays just can't seem to be without company. they try all sorts of ways, changing themselves, even if its for the worse, just to fit in. sad isn't it. i'm all for individualism! haha. but of course, if the friendship comes without the price of having to change yourself, i say GO FOR IT! haha.
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